Number our Days

This has been a year of milestones and markers...In February, we celebrated one year since my surgery.  In March, we found out we are expecting a miracle baby.  In April, we celebrated one year since Jamie's surgery.  In May, we celebrated one year since our engagement.  It just seems like every month there is something to pause and remember, something very specific and meaningful for which to praise God.  September is an extra-special month for Jamie and me...two years ago on September 20, we met!  Neither of us had any idea how that day would change the course of our future forever.  One year ago, yesterday (September 7), Jamie finished his very last day of chemo and said a firm goodbye to cancer.  Then on September 12 last year, we pledged our wedding vows and committed our lives to one another.  So much has happened in one year, and even more has happened in two!

I'm incredibly grateful, because this month I have several opportunities to speak and share our story for women's groups, concerts, and podcast recordings.  My deepest desire is to encourage others as they travel the road of their own journey, and walk in the midst of the storms and celebrations of their own story.  Last night, before I went to bed, this verse just came to mind and I've been meditating over it:

Psalm 90:12 "Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."

I pray that God would help me number my days, seeing that each and every day counts for not just here, but for eternity.  I pray that God would help me see my story in the light of His heavenly and everlasting perspective and to be mindful of the very temporary mist that this life is, of which the book of James speaks.

James 4:13-15 "Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.'  Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, 'If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that.'"

I have to ask myself honestly, even after all I've been through and the many truths I've come to so personally realize about life and God and His story...do I approach each day this way with humble heart?  Or do I forget what I've learned and just plunge forward in the chaotic race that this life becomes?

I feel that in remembering, we honor the sacredness of our stories.  The Lord commanded the Israelites over and over in the book of Deuteronomy with the simple phrase "Do not forget". (4:9, 23; 6:12; 8:11; 25:19)

Do not forget that the Lord brought you out of Egypt.  Do not forget the Lord's commands.  Do not forget His covenant.  Do not forget His promises.  Do not forget His miracles and wonders.

I think of a beautiful hymn written by Fanny Crosby in the late 1800s, which takes pause to remember the Sovereign Hand of God throughout our journey.

All the way my Savior leads me; what have I to ask beside?

Can I doubt His tender mercy, Who through life has been my guide?

Heavenly peace, Divinest comfort, here by faith in Him to dwell

For I know, what e'er befall me, Jesus doeth all things well.

All the way my Savior leads me, cheers each winding path I tread,

Gives me grace for every trial, feeds me with the living bread;

Though my weary steps may falter, and my soul athirst may be,

Gushing from the rock before me, Lo! a spring of joy I see.

All the way my Savior leads me; O the fullness of His love!

Perfect rest to me is promised in my Father's house above;

When my spirit, clothed immortal, wings its flight to realms of day,

This my song through endless ages, Jesus led me all the way.

I can testify that indeed, all the way, every single day, the Savior has led me.  This doesn't mean I always follow Him or obey or take the right step, but this does mean that He is faithful and never has left me alone on the journey.  I trust that He will continue, by His goodness and grace, to lead me all the way home.  Every winding path.  Every trial.  Every faltering step.  Every circumstance and surprise.  He is the fulfillment of every thirst of my soul and every hunger of my heart.  He is the prize and victory of life.  Sometimes I do lose sight of His constant presence and sometimes I do forget what He has done.  I have to be intentional each day to remember.  That's why I'm asking the Lord to teach me to number my days, so that I may gain a heart of wisdom.  Will you join me in that prayer for your life as well?

I'd like to close with a song that I wrote several years ago, Deeper Still.  It is taken from the promises of Psalm 90, and declares the truth of time eternal.  Remember how fleeting a day is.  Remember that time to the Lord is quite different than time is to us.  Remember all He has done in our lives.  Remember His covenant and Word.  

2 Peter 3:8 "But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day."

Psalm 90:1-4 "Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God...A thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by, or like a watch in the night."